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Posted on 2013-03-13 23:51:38 by kansattica
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8 comments (0 hidden)
kansattica
Posted on 2013-03-13 23:52:05 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
This is my first manip, so anything you lot have to say about it would be appreciated.
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-14 01:33:56 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
i'm not usually a big fan of the pony stuff but this was well written and very interesting in approach. i'm going to spare you the gooey details and just say keep up the good work ^_^
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-14 01:38:54 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
(Opinion alert)
While the story is good, I think there's just too much text. Its in a weird place where the story could stand alone if it were longer, but would better fit the picture if it were shorter. A lot of time is spent setting up and describing situations that aren't evident in or immediately relevant to the picture, which again works well in longer stories but not so much in "bite size" chunks like manips. I'd say to first decide whether you want to tell your own story or enhance a picture, and then go with that choice. (For stories, maybe ask the forum for a good place to set up shop.)
On the story itself, I enjoyed it. However, there's some repetition on a few phrases that takes away from them slightly; Pinkie "chimes" something twice in a row, and there are a few other descriptions that don't need to be restated. Otherwise, no problems, and I thought the tray was interesting and unique.
Vanndril
Posted on 2013-03-14 06:05:04 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
I'll second the advice from the anon above.
Personally, every time I make a text manip, I battle with the length of the text.
Generally, I add a sizable white-space addition to the side of a pic. My general rule of thumb, in that case, is: if I can't fit my story in that white space using a font size large enough to be read at 100% zoom, then it's too much. If this happens, I try to chop an unneeded statement or three, maybe scrap a small unnecessary detail.
Now, some people enjoy these text manips with loads of story in them, but personally, in my experience, most people like to be able to see the picture at any time in the reading. If the picture is ever off screen, it's usually not a good thing.
Hypnomangaeditor
Posted on 2013-03-14 13:12:38 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
Goddammit not the Ponies again ... Honestly, I don't understand this weird Internet-meme. Oh well ..
As far as the manip goes - you actually wrote a story that evolves around one picture. Manips aren't actually meant for a whole story to be told with just one picture. If you want to tell a story, you should make it multiple pictures long and try to get the pictures to tell the story while you support it with text - not the other way around. I kind of had the same problem too (I am more a storyteller at heart, than a picture editor) but came up with my solution of Manga-manips.
This doesn't mean it is as simple as that for you, but go more easy on the text part. After all, this is an image board. :)
petal
Posted on 2013-03-14 15:29:28 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
All of the hypnosis-fetish specific websites around right now focus way more on images than text, I think, so it's hard to find a good place to put fanfiction. Making humongous text manips is a much easier way to get feedback than just attaching it to that DA-Entranced group and hoping someone reads it. So I mean, yeah, if you want to make manips with text, brevity is good. If you care more about telling a story, by all means, go the whole hog.
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-16 09:50:12 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
I would seriously suggest fleshing out the story and uploading it to FiMFiction. Perhaps add in an intro setting the whole thing up, stretch out the events described here into multiple encounters and continue on past what is here to see what Pinkie does with AJ now that she has her.
@petal: Aren't you forgetting the EMCSA at mcstories.com?
petal
Posted on 2013-03-16 15:23:29 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
@anon
I believe EMCSA no longer allows fanfiction due to legal issues.
Posted on 2013-03-13 23:51:38 by kansattica
Remove | Add note | Keep | Edit | Note history | Tag History | Previous | Next
8 comments (0 hidden)
kansattica
Posted on 2013-03-13 23:52:05 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
This is my first manip, so anything you lot have to say about it would be appreciated.
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-14 01:33:56 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
i'm not usually a big fan of the pony stuff but this was well written and very interesting in approach. i'm going to spare you the gooey details and just say keep up the good work ^_^
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-14 01:38:54 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
(Opinion alert)
While the story is good, I think there's just too much text. Its in a weird place where the story could stand alone if it were longer, but would better fit the picture if it were shorter. A lot of time is spent setting up and describing situations that aren't evident in or immediately relevant to the picture, which again works well in longer stories but not so much in "bite size" chunks like manips. I'd say to first decide whether you want to tell your own story or enhance a picture, and then go with that choice. (For stories, maybe ask the forum for a good place to set up shop.)
On the story itself, I enjoyed it. However, there's some repetition on a few phrases that takes away from them slightly; Pinkie "chimes" something twice in a row, and there are a few other descriptions that don't need to be restated. Otherwise, no problems, and I thought the tray was interesting and unique.
Vanndril
Posted on 2013-03-14 06:05:04 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
I'll second the advice from the anon above.
Personally, every time I make a text manip, I battle with the length of the text.
Generally, I add a sizable white-space addition to the side of a pic. My general rule of thumb, in that case, is: if I can't fit my story in that white space using a font size large enough to be read at 100% zoom, then it's too much. If this happens, I try to chop an unneeded statement or three, maybe scrap a small unnecessary detail.
Now, some people enjoy these text manips with loads of story in them, but personally, in my experience, most people like to be able to see the picture at any time in the reading. If the picture is ever off screen, it's usually not a good thing.
Hypnomangaeditor
Posted on 2013-03-14 13:12:38 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
Goddammit not the Ponies again ... Honestly, I don't understand this weird Internet-meme. Oh well ..
As far as the manip goes - you actually wrote a story that evolves around one picture. Manips aren't actually meant for a whole story to be told with just one picture. If you want to tell a story, you should make it multiple pictures long and try to get the pictures to tell the story while you support it with text - not the other way around. I kind of had the same problem too (I am more a storyteller at heart, than a picture editor) but came up with my solution of Manga-manips.
This doesn't mean it is as simple as that for you, but go more easy on the text part. After all, this is an image board. :)
petal
Posted on 2013-03-14 15:29:28 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
All of the hypnosis-fetish specific websites around right now focus way more on images than text, I think, so it's hard to find a good place to put fanfiction. Making humongous text manips is a much easier way to get feedback than just attaching it to that DA-Entranced group and hoping someone reads it. So I mean, yeah, if you want to make manips with text, brevity is good. If you care more about telling a story, by all means, go the whole hog.
Anonymous
Posted on 2013-03-16 09:50:12 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
I would seriously suggest fleshing out the story and uploading it to FiMFiction. Perhaps add in an intro setting the whole thing up, stretch out the events described here into multiple encounters and continue on past what is here to see what Pinkie does with AJ now that she has her.
@petal: Aren't you forgetting the EMCSA at mcstories.com?
petal
Posted on 2013-03-16 15:23:29 Score: 0 (vote Up/Down) (Report as spam)
@anon
I believe EMCSA no longer allows fanfiction due to legal issues.
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